The reason I hate chats and smileys

Have you ever been amid people who just love to chat over gtalk or ym and use hundreds of different emoticons or smileys? I just hate that "ding... ding" sound in gtalk when the other "chatter" is saying something. Another reason I hate I hate chat is smiley. Do you really think a person laughs everytime he/she says ":D"? I doubt it. Probably you're just yawning and still send a ":P" just for the heck of it.
But there is one smiley that I love. That is the love smiley "<3". When you type it, it rotates 90 degrees counter clockwise and shows a nice red heart sign. That's cute but that's not the only reason I love this smiley!!! This one is a mathematically correct smiley !!!!! Now don't frown... think about it, what can be better than two people (hopefully a girl and a guy) and some love. I'd always say a third person is strict "no no" here. So matters of heart better stay between two (or <3) people only. And we are always in love with ourselves, so the case of 1 (which is <3) is covered as well. Now that's what I call mathematical precision.
When I think of chats, there is one piece of crap that I can't stop hating. That is lolspeak. Check out this video if u aren't already pissed of by lol's.